True Life Change
“We don’t know all the abuses she’s really endured because she was passed around so much.” Kim McGainey Area Director of Southeast Alabama shares this about 15 year-old, Kari*. What we do know about Kari though, is that she is a sweet girl, and despite her chronological age of 15, she functions more as an 8 or 9 year old, due to the severe head trauma she had suffered at the hands of her mom.
As hard as it is to comprehend, her mom’s discipline often included yelling and severe punishment, including striking her about the head with an iron skillet. There was so much scarring in her head that there were scabs, so her social workers had to carefully shave her head so they could be treated and heal properly.
“She had a very tough upbringing that included pretty severe emotional and physical abuse by her mom. She (mom) would pass her to all kinds of people; an ‘aunt’ or ‘uncle’—but none really were. They were people who just agreed to keep her,” says Kim.
Also disheartening about Kari’s story, is that for most of her life, she was never called by her name. She was just referred to as, “that girl.”
Kim says, “Our goal was to make her feel safe, comfortable, and loved. Because I knew she had not been called by name, we focused a lot on things we could do to help build her self-esteem. We decorate the rooms for each child when they come into care. So for Kari, we bought big letters and spelled them out on her wall so it was the first thing she saw when she walked in, big and bright!”
Despite all that she’s been through, Kim says that Kari was a delight. And even though we didn’t have her in our Campus Care home for very long, the changes that came about while she was with us were truly life changing. She was able to participate in a youth retreat at church, and in that time, she accepted Christ and was baptized shortly after.
Kim says, “She really understood that the Lord loved her. She had never experienced that kind of love before, and she wanted SO badly for her mom to know that kind of love. I was honored to be with her at her baptism, and as we were waiting on those steps, I’ll never forget the sweetness of the moment when Kari looked at me and said, ‘I need to pray for my mom.’
“She prayed the most sincere prayer. She prayed that her mom could forgive her too, because she knew she had also not been kind to her. She prayed that God would heal their relationship; that she could be the kind of daughter she needed to be to her mom—to be a positive light for her. It was amazing.”
Not only does Kari now know her name, but her heavenly father does too, as her name is forever written on the palms of his hands.
*Name and photo has been changed for privacy reasons.